reevaluare 1

this week we're gonna replace the "she"s and "her"s with "he"s and "his/him"s in a fragment from "hilda and rango" by anais nin. we're gonna call it "hild and rango", so we also gonna replace hilda with hild.

"His body smelled like a precious-wood forest; his hair, like sandalwood, his skin, like cedar. It was as if he had always lived among trees and plants. Lying at his side, deprived of his fulfillment, Hild felt that the female in him was being taught to submit to the male, to obey his wishes. He felt that he was still punishing him for the gesture he had made, for his impatience, for his act of leadership. He would rouse and deprive him until he had broken this willfulness in him.

Had he understood that it was involuntary, not truly in him? Whether he had or not, he was blindly determined to break him. Over and over again they met, undressed, lay side by side, kissed and caressed themselves to a frenzy, and each time he pushed his penis downwards and hid it away.

Over and over again he lay passive, showing no desire, no impatience. He was in a state of excitement, which exacerbated all his sensibilities. It was as if he had taken new drugs that made the entire body more alive to caresses, to a touch, to the very air. He felt his clothes on his skin like a hand. It seemed to him that everything was touching him like a hand, teasing his nipples, his thighs continuously. He had discovered a new realm, a realm of suspense and watchfulness, of erotic wakefulness such as he had never known.

One day when he was walking with him, he lost the heel of one shoe. He had to carry him. That night he took him, in the candlelight. He was like a demon crouching over him, his strong penis pounding into him, into the man whose submission he first demanded, submission to his desire, his hour."